Rant

Just down a cup of caramel flavored baileys mixed with milk. My type of milk before bed. Hahaha.

Anyways, life is pretty crazy for me these months. :(

As you know i've graduated from Poly in May and i'm not intending to further my study just yet because of finance reasons and also in particular of what i want to study actually. I mean university definitely cost a bomb and why would i wanna waste on something that i'm uncertain of, right? So yea. I've decided to go on and experienced some working life first.

Up till today still have no successful application gotten through, or maybe the companies need a longer time before they get back to me??? Well idk... But yea, been really frustrated with it. I dare say i am now more active in finding jobs and sending my resume and coming up with cover letters and whateversoever shizzle that are necessary. IT IS NOT EASY AT ALL. Regardless how good you are or how not fussy you are over finding a damn job that you're gonna be stuck with it for 2/3 years?

This might be funny? But i actually went to SIA interview just to try!!!!! I mean i have nothing to lose, my family members said i should just go ahead especially my Sister! My friend who got in told that to me too. So after some times i decided to just go ahead because really, i've nothing to lose regardless i got in or not. It is definitely fun! I have never ever thought of going these interviews, i mean being a air strewardess has never even ever cross my mind man. But it is really nerve-wracking and pretty interesting! HAHAHA. Despite not getting through the first round, i still enjoyed myself. Just so you know when i went for the interview mostly i was just thinking about the experience, it really didn't matter i got in or not, of course if i get in that would mean a bonus to me actually. Hahaha. P/S: i tried twice already! I went the second try because i thought the first time i totally was in shocked and in like panic state 200% of the time so i thought that wasn't me and i should give myself another try. Hehehe. The only thing that bothers me is that, they wouldn't share with you why didn't you make it. I mean if i know why i will know where to improve myself on.

I regretted not planning my after graduate life earlier. Why? Because i initially thought i was really gonna be continuing my studies however after certain talks from different humans, nah. Life is not always as you thought it is. It won't fall into pieces that easily. Really.

I've been pressurised by friends around me about what am i doing with life now is kinda another shizzle i have to deal with. I don't need to deal with them but like they said, people won't stop talking shit about you, unless actions being shown. As we all know Actions speak louder than words so regardless of what i have for them to hear me out, it will still be useless. All i need is a little more faith and push but seems like these months have had them thinking i've been doing nothing but wasting time on odd jobs and getting fat. Not till i get a damn job will they stop. Like i mentioned it is not easy. But they won't know.

So hence, feeling pretty negative inside and out recently and that's just not me man. Of course, i've a few to be there giving me small pep-talks. It might not be much but it just makes me feel all better and encouraged. Maybe different humans have different ways to potray themselves but some words just hurt because they aren't in my shoes and i am the only one will be hurt, not them.

I really am trying harder already, helping my Papa bit by bit in his job. Hahaha Marine is a pretty interesting industry. I've been staying home so much recently too because i want to avoid people because i really really have enough of people saying i'm doing nothing in my life and wasting away when i'm mother fucking not. Although staying home too much is too much to handle. Hahahahahaha. Like literally, i can't believe myself too, i don't even remember when was my last time staying home for as long as i can man. Hahahaha.

It's nearly 2am and another week is here again, and another week of my trying to get fitter and sending all my shizzle out into all sorts of company. Oh god, but it's pretty fun because i get to come across different kind of companies. Hahaha.

Ohya, the haze is really annoying and getting into my nerves, literally. Family having phlegmy throats or blocked nose. Ugh. -___- It really ain't pleasant at all. So frustrated i can't.

That's all for this post i guess.

I wanna restart................ nightzxczcxz

Late night sleeps

So ever since i've ended my Poly in March (although i only officially graduated 2 weeks back hahaha), my body clock have slowly been really crazy over the past 3 months that sleeping at 3/4am is actually my new 1/2am. That's really bad man.

2 weeks back i will actually wake up around 3-5pm because there's this period i'm not occupied with anything so it was like eat sleep laze repeat. Literally man. Hahahaha. It is pretty relaxing and just pure laziness.

Well, i've started exercising a week or so back and i'm glad my stamina is still up there for all my 30mins run. Hahaha. The feeling of the aftermath never fail to make me feel so good about myself!

I've started my workouts on flexibility stretchings and also squat and some handstands and arm exercises too. I haven't been doing all these favourites for months and i feel sorry for myself because i'm a person that has no full discipline and that's just upsetting. :(

Due to those, i've gone smaller in size, because my muscles i used to make in the gym are all gone. MY SEXY FAVOURITE PERKY A$$ IS GONE TOO, POOF NO MORE. I'm legit sad!!! As mentioned in one of my instagram post, i do check my ass out every single day without fail and to see the change, getting smaller, is like WHAT THE FUCK MANDY FUCK YOU GO DO SQUATS BITCH. Hahahahaha. So yes, starting all over again.

At least i didn't quit but starting over each time isn't any better too. Like why the fuck won't you want to finish what you started? Like once and for all, get it done and over with! Yea. Totally hate this whole process but who can i blame? Me lo, who else. Pfft.

Discipline is really the key to it and i just need to find one way or the other to really get myself together and do this shizzlezzz man. FTS. ugh................

All i need to fucking do is to program it into my body with will like how is that difficult, Mandy?! Just 1 hour of your 24 hours a day is all it takes!!!!!!!!! :'''''(

No point crying over spilled milk, they said
Let the actions do the talking, they said
I'm gonna sleep now, i said hahahaha goodnight party peopleeeeeeeee.

Oh. Apparently it's Wednesday and i'm not partying lolol. k bye.

Another chance would be great

After so many years, you just popped out of my mind, out of nowhere from no one nor things that remind me about you. I really wish i wasn't that crazy 5/6 years back when we were talking.
I could've really get to know you better or more, or rather should've done those during our long chats. Sigh. But years have flew by and i still know that you are just the mysterious guy that i ever known that i talked to for so damn long.

Like who are you?
Proud Unijiro. WHO?

Heck do i even know whether the name is real or were you even real.
At least i know that Kiss The Rain was the realest among whatever happened years back.

Hahaha oh well..... :)

B Z

Days have been busy and it will just get busier.

However, good news is heard!

So my FYP would be ending in 3 weeks time together with my other 2 module projects, too actually. As much as i say shit happens and it got me all frustrated and crazy. IT IS COMING TO AN END.

Yup, all good things do come to an end eventually. Ha ha ha.

Well, 3 weeks isn't long nor short because it all still comes down how productive i am so yea. Hopefully, my focus will still be on track till everything is officially over. Wtf. I am so excited man. But not so excited yet because i know these 3 weeks is gonna be hectic as fuck and i'm sure gonna go crazy all the time. Hahaha.

I shall be away from this space again, or maybe update when i need to clear some thoughts. Or just needed a break.

Before i end, i hope everyone can pray for me that all my codes will just keep on working well and least error can happen.

THANK YOU MUAH MUAH MUAH. Hahahahaha.

Flu-dy

A little update before i crash my soul.

So i woke up feeling all fine this Morning, till the afternoon. I caught a flu.

HAVING FLU IS A BITCH.

Each fucking time i caught a flu and sneeze so badly, i just wanna chop my fucking nose of man. I'm not even kidding.

I will think of Voldemort. LOL.

Whenever i caught a flu it will always be so bad i feel sick everywhere and just wanna curl up. :'(

I be like, 'Shoot me. SHOOT me. shoot ME. SHOOT ME. FUCK'

Ugh.

I guess is because i spent about 6 hours in the semi cold yet hot area in School doing my FYP. Fuck man. It is so annoying when i catch a flu.

It followed me throughout my lesson, which worsen, 3pm-5pm. I was apparently disrupting the lesson, kinda. I got used to it of course so it didn't really matter and what else is that i cant control my flu either.

SO BLOODY ANNOYING. The mucus just runs like it's on a marathon and the sneeze just come and go as if i'm on drug and listening to metal rock music which had my head go banging each time. Hahahaha. Sounds kinda hilarious that i described it this way and imagine the scenario in my head. Ha ha ha.

Taken my flu med an hour ago and is slowly kicking in and i'm slowly feeling the drowsiness, which is good because i think i need to sleep soon anyway too.

Despite the flu which annoyed the shit outta me, i still went to the gym for my Cardio Tuesday. I swear i was quite close to heading home man. Started well as my nose was being quite obedient however, half way through when i was about to end my workout i sneezed so badly.

I think i was even snapchatted by the guy(who has mutual friend with me but idrk him), bitch. I wasn't sure but his friend kinda hinted and talked loudly and i could hear them. I was like staring at them too with my annoying soul. Lol loser.

Currently getting some FYP shit done because there's really alot to edit or add. Fml man. Lol.

Seriously man.

CANT WAIT FOR THIS SHIT TO BE OVER.

Goodnight.

Tmr i will be fine. Yes i will.

bye

B△STILLE

Yes, from the above caption. It was B△STILLE's Concert that i couldn't make it today!!! :(

I was really kinda sad because i listened to their whole Bad Blood album and Dan has such an unique voice and all the songs are just simply too good to not hear it live man! Yes, i didn't went to their concert which happened yesterday(Friday). 

Well, i wanted to buy their tickets already but i didn't wanna go alone, again(or else 3rd time leh). I mean i don't mind going alone because i am ultimately there to enjoy the band however is always better to go with someone else and share the fun and joy i'm feeling. 

So for about 1 months plus i've been asking around however, only one of my friend, Ed, was interested however he was the last resort cuz he was probably going with his friend. Oh well, no one was interested and the date was nearing so no choice but to ask Ed whether he wanna go with me.

I was actually hesitating. :(

That's because i was cash tight and if i were to go, i would need to touch my savings which wasn't in the plan at all! I mean if i wasn't cash tight, I WOULD HAVE GONE, honestly speaking. Why? This is because is not like they visit Singapore that often or have concert any near in the future so if i miss this means i hafta wait like 10 years(exaggerated HAHAHA). So yea. 

Well, Sam didn't mind going me but i know he wanted to go with me because he didn't want me to go alone not because he was a fan of them. It would be a waste of his money although it was sweet of him. Regardless, he couldn't since he is still in the Army.

So i asked Ed eventually with hesitant and what i realised was this Concert will only last at most 2 hours and it cost $110. It is considered cheap for a Concert but the duration made me think twice. Thanks to Ed for all the negative comments(actually just persuading me not to go lo HAHAHA) which i kinda agreed to, eventually, i didn't buy.

Few days back i was like, 'WHY I NO MONEY TO GO.' I really really really wanna hear them live. Dat voice you know. Hahaha. #poorgirl95

Hit the gym this afternoon and i was all, 'It's Friday and i'm actually not going for B△STILLE. Wow man.' I was kinda thinking about it throughout the day, on and off. Since i've no friends going means i wouldn't be able to get any snippets of their concert. So sad. :( 

Unlike the other band, Krewella who was at Zouk last month however, i couldn't make it due to Dance training but thank god for videos from my friend who went!!! It was good enough but being there will definitely be better right! Hopefully they will be back for FMFA 2015? Hahaha. PRAY.

Despite my left ass ache/hurt like a pain in the ass(puny not? Hahaha), i still went for Bboy training, persuaded by Brice too. Muahaha. Well, B△STILLE's Concert was happening when i was training. #justsaying :'( ok maybe not #justsaying

Bboy training ended but i kinda self declared it ended half way because my lazy ass was just being lazy as fuck and not motivated. Hahahaha. Busy snapchatting the rest and KH. HAHAHA. Bimbo moments with the REALEST missing Zhengyu though. Hahaha. Laugh like crazy as always. :')

It was almost 10pm so i decided to head home first and Hillary walked me to the bus stop and sent me off. Cho sweettttzxczxcz. Muah muah. 

While i was on the bus, i was starting to feel kinda dizzy and nauseous all thanks to the jerky yet speedy bus. Almost doze off just before my stop. So tired man. pffffft.

Ohya. 

My Mummy called a anaconda as avocado. HAHAHAHAHA.

Joke the day. Hehehe.

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UPDATED

So i added Isabelle/Popspoken on Snapchat and they were at the B△STILLE's Concert and guess what?! SHE FREAKING SNAPCHATTED THROUGHOUT THE CONCERT.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I was like watching live from home! Although it wasn't full complete snap due to the time limit snapchat given but you know what? IT IS ENOUGH FOR ME TO ENJOY ALONE AT HOME!!! :D

I was literally singing along at home and was so thankful i added them because they added me about 2 hours ago only. HENG AH. HAHAHAHA.

HEHEHE. So happy. ^_^

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Finally talked to Samson after 5 days. Silly can only book out on... Sun... day... Man oh man. Well, at least i get to hear his voice and listened to his rants regarding his Scorpion. Hahaha. So happening and tough. Oh gosh. I can't wait to see him. 

Time for bed, 1.30am already!!!

Meeting my Bimby Cherie for Brunch before heading to School. I am going to use all the food voucher tmr since last day. HAHAHA. #cheapoMandy

Okiedokie bye. Shall end off with a selfie long time ago cuz i vain, cuz i can too. HAH.

#boldlips5eva

2 days in 1

Since it has past 12am. It's already Thursday!

No shit that time fly man. Hahaha.

Yesterday(Tuesday) was pretty relaxed.

I headed School from 10am-3pm for my FYP but it was very productive and i took a freaking nap after Lunch. Well, that nap was productive though. Hahaha. I don't know man, everytime after Lunch i will definitely feel sleepy, even though i had enough sleep the previous night. Oh god. So annoying.
But thank god for sweet groupmate, Ada, who always allow me to sleep. Hehehe. I asked her why and she said she would rather i take the nap and be awake after that than to be half awake throughout. So true! Thumbs up man. Hahaha.

Anyway, had lesson from 3pm to 5pm and hit the gym for my Cardio day. First time trying the static cycle with the instructions given to increase resistance and/or pedal power. Holy shit man. But i think i just might love the intensity of it and the result of course, although i'm just getting started. Weee~

Ended my day around 6pm and went back home straight because i was fucking hungry and so i whipped out my pasta dish out cause there wasn't dinner at home, sadly. I was very reluctant because i dislike washing dishes as it will make my hands rough. Hahaha. Well, for the sake of my tummy, i have to. Made pasta with cherry tomatoes, peanuts and egg(which failed because i took out from the boiling too fast HAHAHA).

Slept right after masking da face. SHIOK.

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Today(Wednesday).

Class was at 9am however, i was being a lazy ass to get outta bed on time even though i woke up on time. Hahaha. Ada even called me up but hahaha laziness you win this time.

Prepared and didn't really had a full breakfast since i was running late. Checked the bus 98 before i left house and it was freaking 15 mins. Bloody hate it man, even if i'm up early the BUS IS GONNA MAKE MY EARLY ASS LATE. -___-
And i just need the 2 stops to reach Jurong East Interchange to take the train man. Idiotic. There's 2 bus to the Interchange however the other bus will take 15 mins to reach because it goes one big round.

(LOL uploaded this picture and my laptop just shut down auto cuz no battery)

So i decided to walk to another bus stop to take 185 since it was 12 mins and walking there will take about 5-7 mins. One thing bad about that bus stop is that the sun is directly facing you and the heat is TERRIBLE. While waiting for the bus to arrive i was kinda hopping from spot to spot to shelter myself. Hahaha. Got on to the bus and surprisingly it was kinda fast and i only took 20mins. Probably gonna take me about 30mins if i were to wait for bus 98 man. Pfft.

Walked into class and there were only 5 students out of 16. HA HA HA. No full attendance before since day 1 though. Lecturer taught a new topic again. :( Computing module. Sianzxczxczcxzczczx maxxxxxxxxxxxx. Hahahaha. But all is good, all is good. *chants 'last lap before graduating'* Hahahahaha.

Ended class at 11pm+, he released early, YAY. Headed for Lunch, luckily there were spaces since it Lunch time. Read XX's Blog and the SMRT while having my Lunch. Good good. I think i love to read only when it is interesting. Hahaha. Duh.

Climbed up to Hilltop after Lunch cuz my group was needed to prep for the Openhouse that was happening for the Secondary students. Nothing much to prep actually. Lol. It was very slack, did nothing basically since my laptop was use to showcase our prototype.

I was mainly the one showcasing our FYP Project to the students when the arrived at the DMIT School. Hahaha. Well, in exchange for food vouchers by other groupmates who didn't wanna present. WHY NOT. $4 each person leh. $4x3=$12. WHOOP. #CheapoMandy

Well thank god it ended early at 5pm+. Initially it was supposed to end at 6pm and i got all annoyed and sad cause i won't be able to gym but i still brought my gym gear IN CASE. I had dance training at 7pm after that and i assumed if i were to end at 6pm it will drag so i wouldn't make it.

BUT YAY. I managed to Gym. Rushed to the gym down from Hilltop quickly change and did my thang. Ended within an hour and legs were slightly wobbly, yep leg days. I tried not to do too intense since i need to cut down those muscular bigass thigh. Hahaha. :'(

I decided to grab Subway for dinner and Ros came from behind to surprise me. Hahahaha. I was like, 'Eh Ros!' Then she sarcasticly went, 'Never see me before meh?' Idiot. Hahaha.
Did i mentioned i only spent 50 cents on Subway thanks to the food vouchers given. HAHAHA. I generously gave Ros $2 food voucher and she went to buy her KFC Curry Bucket Rice? I tried a little and it was kinda salty lo. LOL.

I was late for dance but then i bumped into Unkle, Ben and Jevin and chatted regarding my future????? HAHAHA. Thanks for all the tips and experience y'all shared.

Quickly went for training after.

I can conclude it was really a fun training because idky but i was feeling very happy and laughing throughout the training with others. I mean i'm always happy just that today the laughter kinda was those happiness. Hahaha. If you know, you know what i'm saying.

Ended quite late at 10.30pm but a fun training i wouldn't mind. Hehehe.

Bus 185 home with Yixin and Ben, AKA the hungry 185 passengers waiting for Yixin to bake for us(Ben & I), delivery method will be by bus 185. Hahahahaha. Inside jokes.

Snapchat my way home like i always do. I just love to watch and do crazy stuffs.

ADD ME AND I WILL ADD YOU TOO HEHEHE.

Snapchat: mandddddy

Ok TIME FOR BED. CLASS @ 10AM LEH. HAHAHA GOODNIGHT BITCHES. ^_^